These are the things I thought. I wish I hadn’t.
- I’m so lucky to have someone who will work for me.
This works both ways, that person is coming to you for a reason – money, experience and what you’ve built to this date. Be it a business or a career.
- I can’t criticise her, or I’ll lose her.
Criticising, offering feedback and being frank are the best things you can give someone you are leading. Now, I can occasionally be brutally honest when I feel my time has been wasted – or something could have been done significantly better. I have seen staff benefit from this mix of firm and gentle guidance.
- It’ll look bad if I leave early… to her.
Everyone is in different stages of their life. The more decision making that is required of you, the stronger your mind frame will need to be. So if you need to step away, take a break, get some time out – do it. Because you will be a better manager for it.
- There are lines they can’t cross even if you want those lines to disappear.
Yes. Friends. Don’t we wish it could all be just Friday night drinks and lunches at the park? I’m not saying that it can’t. But much like someone on the outside of your family doesn’t really “get” your family – it’s the same. Someone on the outside of your role, doesn’t really “get” your role. It’s just how it us unless they go through the same experience.
Managing staff is tricky. More so when you’re younger.
I simply wish I trusted in myself then, the way I do now. I was smart enough to be able to pay someone a wage. That should have been a confidence boost enough – but it wasn’t. I got there in the end, but I wasted a lot of years talking myself down.
I don’t think you need to.