I want a career again.
I want a sense of identity again.
A sense that goes beyond my children.
Beyond my marriage.
Something that is mine and only mine.
Other things feel so tempting, like selecting furniture or doing the dishes. Would you believe. But I know, all this will fade away. After a time, I’ll be left with a shell of it and nothing for myself.
Creating a vision…
I really want to do a TED Talk or a read aloud session of what I write.
I also want to be paid for what I write, but I’m not sure anyone will buy it?
Why would you buy a book so heavy about heavy stuff?
It feels like too much…
How can I earn an income from this?
How can I charge for this?
Influence? Do I gain so much influence?
Charity? Do people make a donation?
Hard copy book of thoughts…
Make something outside of the book – a little everyday. A thought a day. A stack of cards to keep you going? To keep you mindful?
My words are here to keep you afloat.
Yes, I’m contemplative, but I want to be more.