womanhood

a work in progress

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I fell in love at 21 and it turned my world upside down.

It wasn’t what I was expecting.
To be honest, I left home for more of the party-esque lifestyle.
Perhaps some drinking.
Perhaps some drugs.
Perhaps a few relationships.
Perhaps a job or two.
Then of course a move to New York or something just as dreamy.

Within 4 weeks of moving to Melbourne, I bumped into V.
Friend of a friend.
That sort of thing.

It pretty much spiralled from there.
He said to me he was going to marry me after our first date.

So many things about us were unconventional and against the world we knew.
I was just as different for him as he was for me.

Some of my friends were a bit weirded out.
I didn’t care.

A lot of people were concerned he came from a traditional background.
I didn’t care.

There is a casual sort of racism towards Indians from India among Indians who are born here. I can say it, because I know it. And likely at one point, I was among it and believed it. V is an Indian from India. I’m not.
I didn’t care.

He wore a brown turtle neck.
I didn’t care. Actually I cared, but not enough.

He didn’t have much money. I didn’t even know how little it was.
I didn’t care.

When we got engaged, I was 22.
I didn’t care.

When we got married, I was 23.
I didn’t care.

It was not how I thought my life would turn out.
Married in suburbia at 23. I would come home from work and cry on my bed.
My sisters went travelling to China and I was married.
Tragic I know. #firstworldproblems #thatstillmatter

He cared.
He guided me to change my scene at work.
He stressed about the finances when I started freelancing.
He worried about the strain upon me when we had staffing issues.
He spent money on my travel when I didn’t see how little we had in the accounts.
He cooked throughout my pregnancy and true to date, always prioritised me over Aru.

He is the husband my dreamiest dreams would never have encountered.
Which is why I think it’s great if you choose not to go by society standards.
Find the rough diamond that everyone thinks is a nugget of coal.
Go against the grain.
Ignore those concerns if your heart is in the right place.
Take the risk.
Follow it through.

And whatever they say.
Don’t care.

 

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10 Comments

  1. Just beautiful. How magical, a marriage declaration after the first date ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. This is a brilliant brilliant piece of writing. The world needs to hear MORE from women in happy relationships ๐Ÿ™‚

    • karishma

      Thanks so much! I’m so over anti-marriage and anti-husband posts ๐Ÿ™‚ I’m a huge fan of husbands! ๐Ÿ™‚ xx

  3. Meeta

    love the simplicity which flows from your heart,you write so effortlessly yet what you pen is so intense.

  4. words that melt the heart Kish……I’m glad I met my rough diamond too. xx

  5. Shweta

    Hi Karishma,

    I loved this post of yours… Loved it..
    You expressed it beautifully…

    Thanks for sharing this.

    Cheers

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