I think we don’t know when we need help.
Maybe it isn’t that bad. Chances are, it’s not suicide, or coming home drunk every night. Chances are, it’s not domestic abuse, just significant mean words and some door slamming.
Usually. It’s not that bad.
But I don’t think we realise. That by then, it’s already too, too bad. So much damage has already been done.
But let’s use good old fashioned preventative measures, to prevent you from making Stage 1 a closer step to Stage 2.
1. You’ve been fighting about the same thing, over and over. If you argue about something over 3 times, something needs to change.
- You have been mulling about something over a fortnight. It’s draining you of your energy and the thoughts won’t go away, no matter how hard you’re trying with the yoga and the meditation.
Somethings are next level. I consider yelling in front of children, slamming doors, any form of domestic abuse all next level. It’s a trigger for Step 2, so seek some help and nip it in the bud.
You feel the same way about your career as you did 3-6 months ago. We’re particularly resistant to career range and we often find ourselves in the same place, even if we want change. Therapists aren’t just for relationships you know.
When you’re taking your personal matters to your friends and family. Think about life in sections. You shouldn’t bitch about colleagues to your boss. They’re in the same section of your life. Work. The same way, don’t bitch about husbands to your sisters. They’re in the same section of your life. When people are in the same section, the bias can swing. Dangerously. If you need to address changes, do it outside of the section with someone unbiased.
So is it time?
Or are do you still feel like denying it?